Deciding to Live with Your Signficiant Other
Dating someone serious? Thinking about moving in together? Well slow your horses and evaluate a few essential things first.
First, you need to set a budget. Yes, talking about money is awkward, but start there to see if this is even a possibility. If you can’t talk about it openly, then how do you plan to live together?
Then, you need to see if you share similar lifestyle choices and standards. Does this mean you have to live life exactly the same? Of course not. You can be different, but you must respect each other and the way you live whether it is the same or different.
Another topic to discuss is space. Some people are excited to move in together, but don’t realize you are signing up to share everything all the time — all day, every day. If you like your space, maybe consider getting a bigger apartment or an extra room. Talk about your space issues so it is out in the open and not bottled up. That way, he or she knows it is not that you are sick of them, you just like alone “me” time.
You also need to determine who will do what. You need to have a mutual understanding of how you will split tasks. Chores don’t have to be split down the middle, but they should be discussed and agreed upon. That way you avoid conflict later on. Say you hate to clean but love to cut the grass, you can decide that is a fair trade. It is up to you two, but it should be agreed upon.
And lastly, talk decorations. It seems like you would just naturally decide on something you both like, but it doesn’t always work that way. Ideally you would compromise, by if you let your partner choose, you need to remember to not hold it against them later on. You can’t claim you simply let them pick and did them a favor if you both talked about it openly. So either decide together or let one person take control, but be honestly okay with it as to not leverage it against them in the future.
As you plan your move-in, the underlining key is communication. Behind every decision, you need to be open and voice your thoughts. This way you can tackle any conflict or tension head on instead of letting it build and explode later on. Once that is all said and done, you can enjoy the perks of living together in harmony. Sure there will be bumps along the road, but you will have a strong, healthy structure to build off of.