Tackling Relationship Confrontation
You and your significant other are probably still riding that post-Valentine’s Day high. You had a wonderful, sweet time together, and you never want to face reality again. But there’s no way to avoid the inevitable. As the saying goes, shit happens. You have work, responsibilities and other commitments that sometimes get in the way of your happily ever after. Conflict naturally creeps into any relationship.
If everything was perfect all the time, your love life would be a fairy tale. While a ton of conflict can rise serious red flags in a relationship, occasional minor conflicts aren’t as serious, but still take a toll on your feelings.
If you hate confrontation as much as I do, resolving relationship bumps can be difficult. And if done improperly, can even prolong the issue. Here are a few tips on how to combat conflict in any relationship. Every person reacts differently to conflict, so keep that in mind while testing out these techniques.
Lay it out
If you sense turbulence in your relationship, make sure to point it out. You don’t want to risk each other not opening up only to lead to pent up anger. If you let your problems build up, they may be harder to resolve in the long run. While bringing up conflict can be uncomfortable, it is best to bring it up sooner than later to see if it can be nipped it in the bud. If it is a small concern, you will be able to talk it out, and everything will be back on track. But if it’s a bigger issue, simply bringing it up will not be enough, and you will need to take more time and effort to resolve your issue.
Once you have opened the relationship gates of hell, some people need time to think. Maybe it is because neither of you want to risk saying something you will regret. Or in some cases, you simply need to clear your head. In this situation, don’t be afraid of silence. Give yourselves time to think about the issue, without the stress of needing to resolve it immediately.
Provide a solution
After you’ve both had time to talk about your initial issue and take time to think, provide a mutually beneficial solution. When coming up with this solution, think with a win-win mindset. You don’t want to belittle each other or have one person cave in. You want to collaborate on a resolution that will make both of you comfortable. Do not be selfish when reaching a solution. Take time and think about how both of you can move past it and grow stronger as a couple.
Relationship conflict is normal in any functioning relationship. How you tackle these issues is how you grow stronger as a couple. If your relationship is all conflict and no play, then it might be time to reevaluate your situation. If conflict constantly overwhelms your relationship, get out. And please don’t purposefully cause relationship drama merely for the makeup sex at the end, because that is just manipulative.