Drug Testing Reviews – Make Sure You Pass a Drug Test
If you smoke pot, or take any form of drug, you have probably worried at some stage about how it would go if you had a random drug test to take. Facebook, Reddit, in fact most social media sites have forums and posts dedicated to people freaking out about their upcoming drug test. The options given range from the absolutely ludicrous to the downright dangerous.
How to fail a drug test
This may come as a surprise, but if you follow a lot of the well-meaning, but completely misguided advice on the internet, chances are high that you will not pass that drug test. You cannot substitute your urine for lightly colored water, you cannot use your girlfriend’s pee, you cannot add dishwashing liquid and you cannot buy frozen urine over the internet and use that. Those are just the options that won’t actually hurt you (but will likely get you kicked off the team, suspended from school or fired from your job).
Of the more dangerous variety, drinking bleach will do absolutely nothing to help you pass your drug test, if you are lucky it will just make you very, very sick.
How to pass a drug test
If you want to actually pass a drug test, these are your options:
- Don’t take drugs. Actually, this isn’t foolproof. If you have been around pot smokers then you may still get a false positive for marijuana markers if you undergo a hair analysis test. There are also a range of prescription and over the counter medications that can cause a positive to a range of substances including alcohol and methamphetamine.
- Detox your system. There are a range of different products on the market that can boost your kidneys and give them a helping hand to strip unwanted toxins from your system. Usually these also work best if you combine with an increased water intake and flush using a sweat it out method.
- Strip your hair. There are a few different methods and products that can help you get a really deep cleanse and remove any trace of drugs from your inner hair shaft. However, this obviously is only going to be useful if you have a hair analysis test coming up.
- Urine substitute. If you are looking at a urine test, using an alternative urine product is probably going to be your best bet. It can be a bit complicated if you are undergoing a supervised test (where you are actually in the same room as your testing supervisor while you pee), but anything is possible.
Which product do I need?
This will largely depend on what you have taken and what sort of testing you are looking at. You can go through Drug Testing Reviews to check out the range of different products and options and get unbiased information. However, as a general overview this is what you are looking at:
Hair sample testing
To pass this type of drug test you are going to need super clean hair. However, no matter what the shampoo commercial says, your standard supermarket brand is not going to be able to deliver the level of intensely deep clean that you will need. A couple of products are Aloe Rid and Toxin Wash, and are usually used in combination with a vinegar rinse, a baking soda paste, an ultra-clean shampoo and/or an ammonia based hair dye. You can use these stripping shampoo products on their own, but generally you will get a better result if you follow the instructions to ensure that the hair cuticle is open in order to allow the shampoo to penetrate the hair shaft. You might like to look at the Jerry G Method or the Murjco Method as well. Whichever way you go, you will need to ensure that you are buying the genuine product. Because of their popularity (and a recipe change that made the shampoos less effective), there are a lot of fakes on the market, so go through a reputable supplier.
Blood tests are less commonly used for routine drug tests, being more specialized, requiring more protocols and being more expensive. However, if you do have a blood test then you need to be aware of the timeline of how long drugs are likely to be detected, and what substance they are looking for. Generally, a blood test won’t detect anything taken more than two weeks prior. Most of the time a blood test won’t detect anything taken more than 72 hours prior (and in the case of LSD it is out of your system in 3 hours).
To pass a blood test you are going to need to drink a LOT of water to help flush your system. There are also a range of detox drinks that help both mask the presence of THC markers in your blood and help flush your system (so this can help with urine testing as well). Generally, you will need to sweat, so get to the gym and get exercising. If you can, follow it up with a hot sauna and keep drinking both water and the detox drink. Of course, you can develop hyponatremia (like this) if you just down several liters of water in one sitting. Space it out!
Be aware of modern sample collection jars that are “tamper proof.” They are not really, but they do have temperature sensitive strips designed to pick up if the liquid in the bottle is not at the right temperature for human urine fresh out of a bladder. This is particularly for those that are going to with popular 1980s method of using a frozen sample from a clean friend.
Synthetic urine is a more modern and popular option, coming in both powder form (which means it is easily stored and transported) or a premade liquid form (meaning it is ready to go whenever you have a test popped on you).
If in doubt
Your final option is to simply say that you have been taking a substance that has been shown to generate false positive results. For example, Advil has been known on occasion to have the same markers as THC and Sudafed has been known to create a false positive for methamphetamine. However, you will still need to take another test to prove that you are clean, so you are just buying yourself a little more time.