Juggling Your Lovers
We see them everywhere. From tween television series to the movies, we see love triangles more often than not. And realistically, love triangles aren’t just limited to the big screen. It is not uncommon to have two crushes at one time.
For some people, it happened in high school with the stereotypical group of friends that all dated one another at some point. For others, it was in college while living in the dorms and liking one person on one floor and someone else down the hall. Or post school in the real world of dating apps. You go on a new date with a different person every night, and eventually find you want to pursue more than one person. While there is no shame in juggling a couple lovers at once, it can get complicated quick.
For starters, feelings get involved. When things are casual it is smooth sailing. But once one party starts to develop strong feelings, there is a lot more on the line to risk. Then there are titles. If you are dating around you aren’t guilty, but if someone wants to put a title on your current relationship then there is pressure to stay loyal and cut off anyone else in the picture.
But what if making that decision is just too hard? Here are a few tips to cutting out the excess lovers and breaking the triangle:
Yes this sounds childish, but it works. You technically can’t compare people because everyone is different in their own way, but maybe one person’s difference is better suited to you. By making a list, you see on paper the qualities of both lovers and why you fell for each. At the end of the day you will hopefully decide if quality or quantity outweigh the other.
Put the list down for a second and just think about your chemistry. Do you just instantly connect with one person more than the other? When you are alone, do you find yourself thinking about one more than the other? And do you just click with one more and he or she seems to understand you better? If there is one clear answer, this makes your decision much easier.
Think abut your future and what you want. At this point in your life are you looking for something serious or something quick and fun? Depending on what your answer is, you may find yourself realizing that one lover fits better into the mold you need at this point in your life.
Love triangles are common and are nothing to be ashamed of. However as feelings get more serious, you will need to make a decision to avoid hurting anyone, especially yourself. So do what you must, but make the right choice for you and not based on what anyone else says.