Coping with an Ex Who Moves On
I’ve recently started binge watching Bachelor in Paradise, and I love it. It is a great mix of drama and love, and I can’t get enough of it. One particular storyline that interested me is that of Ashley Iaconetti and Jared Haibon. Just to give you the background story, the two were somewhat of an item last season, but the relationship mostly consisted of a bit of obsession on her part and mostly friend vibes from Haibon. So to sum it up, Iaconetti is friend-zoned while she still very much lusts for Haibon’s attention. While this is all happening, he is trying to find love with someone new.
Some viewers may think Iaconetti is crazy obsessive over her “sort of” ex, but I kind of sympathize with her. Seeing someone you care about with someone else sucks. It is easier to get over someone when you are under someone new, but unfortunately that is easier said than done. So while Iaconetti somewhat attempts to get over her ex, it is hard to not get jealous when your ex is showing major PDA with someone else right next to you.
How can we get over an ex and not come across as creepily obsessive? Here are some tips that will help you stay cool, calm, and collected for the most part:
Make a list
Things obviously ended for a reason. Sometimes it is hard to remember the bad times when you are only focusing on happy memories, so try reminding yourself. Think to yourself or write down all the reasons you and your ex didn’t work out. When you realize all the reasons it didn’t work out, hopefully you will feel better off without your ex. Plus, you will figure what you do and do not want in your next relationship.
Talk it out
Sometimes the best way to get over someone is to talk it out. Venting to your friends isn’t a sign of weakness, instead it shows that you are trying to get over a situation. Plus, your friends may be able to give advice to overcome this tough time. You can also opt to reach out to your ex for the sole purpose of closure. If that is the case, be strong and to the point. Don’t feel weak, and try to get answers you need with minimal drama. If you get closure that is great, but if not, don’t push it and move on with your head high.
Now that you are single, you have time to yourself, and you should take advantage of that. Reconnect with old friends and go out to meet someone new. Maybe pick up a new hobby you have been wanting to try. Relationships often take over our lives, so use this new found freedom to better yourself and let loose to discover the best version of yourself.
Seeing your ex move on isn’t easy, but you can overcome it. Focus on yourself and let go of any drama. Try to surround yourself with positive energy and people who care about you. Getting over your ex won’t happen over night, but you are stronger than you think. Soon enough you will find your own inner happiness and maybe someone new while you are at it.