Baby You’re a Firework
With Independence Day around the corner, you’re probably sticking up for all things ‘Merica. But while you’re focusing on the red, white and booze that’s sure to come this weekend, don’t neglect the fireworks that are bound to happen under the sheets.
How do you stay patriotic during foreplay?
Just like any other holiday, you need to dress for the occasion. So stop by your closest, sexiest lingerie store and look for the perfect red slip. Top off your hot outfit with an all-American top hat. Yeah it may be silly, but it’ll be useful when you give your partner a very patriotic strip tease. And make sure to tell them to follow your every order or they’ll be disappointing their country. Enjoy your star spangled banger!
Pull a Monica
While giving head may not be your favorite American past time, surprise your partner this Fourth of July and he’ll be overjoyed with American pride. Make it fun and do it as soon as the fireworks start. Just make sure you don’t get caught sneaking away from the crowd! Unless you’re into that.
If you’re thinking about acting more like a First Lady this weekend, plan it to perfection. Plan a sweet date during the day. Maybe pack a lunch and head out for a picnic by the monuments. Then once you have finished all the wine, head over to see the fireworks live. Your date will be sure to appreciate all your thoughtfulness.
Let’s say you and your partner aren’t the classiest of couples, and there’s no shame in that. So instead of planning a cute rom-com type date, just get hammered together. Create your own bar crawl and do freedom shots at every bar. And obviously the two of you have to deck out in all-American appeal and show the world you’re that couple.
Whether you’re the kinky, sweet or drunk couple, make sure you go all out this Fourth of July weekend. Head out in our nation’s capital, have a romantic lunch, get drunk and then have amazing, firework-worthy sex all in one day. You owe it to your country to have fun and celebrate on this fine day. Wave both your American and freak flags high and have an exciting weekend.